The four fearsome hurdles were coined by psychotherapist, teacher and writer, David Richo, in his book Past is Present, which also inspired last week’s post (about transference). The fearsome hurdles are four specific tensions that impact us all in relationships and life. These things are a given of life, and core issues in relationships. The […]
A Short Guide to ‘Transference’, the Relationship-harmer
Last weekend I was spending time at my boyfriend’s place. It was his birthday, so we had one or two social engagements, plus he was preparing for something important on a personal project. This meant he had less available attention than usual. As the weekend unfolded, I experienced an old wound reopening. A past unmet […]
How to Accept Yourself as You Are
Remember that scene in Bridget Jones’s Diary where the character played by Colin Firth sheepishly confesses to Bridget “I like you – very much. Just as you are”. That lovely moment is a pure expression of acceptance. And whilst many of us do accept the people in our lives unconditionally, it’s a lot rarer to feel […]
The 10 Stages of Meditation, according to Culadasa
The process of training the mind evolves through ten distinct stages – these are the ten stages of meditation outlined by Culadasa, aka John Yates, in his book, the meditation training manual The Mind Illuminated: A Complete Meditation Guide Integrating Buddhist Wisdom and Brain Science for Greater Mindfulness. Even if you’re a novice meditator like […]
5 ways to tell if you’re a Highly Sensitive Person
Although as many of 15-20% of us would be classed as “highly sensitive”, a lot of those might not know they are. Identifying that you are a Highly Sensitive Person offers the same benefits of learning your Myers Briggs and Enneagram types: it helps you with self-acceptance (a notoriously difficult job), and to structure your […]
How to get yourself through a Funk or an Existential Crisis
Ever spent a few days or weeks feeling flat, listless, sad, unmotivated and/or tired, for no reason that is apparent to you? That’s a funk. And whilst you can wait ’em out, you could also be proactive about their resolution. An existential crisis is a more profound experience. Sometimes called “a dark night of the […]